2 Things You Don’t Want to Do When Writing Jokes for a Speech
Now in talking about how to craft appropriate humor, I’ve hit on some of the things you should ask a client. I’ll get to more of those later, but right now, I’d like to focus on a few things that you DON’T ask your client. Some things don’t need to be asked and you actually should stay away from.
First off, don’t ask them if there are any subjects that you should stay away from. Remember, you are a professional. They hired you because they presume you know what not to say. As my buddy Frank King says, we get paid for knowing what not to say on stage. You don’t want the client to think that you don’t know what’s appropriate and you certainly don’t want them to worry that if they don’t remember ALL the taboo subjects you should stay away from, that you might slip up and say something horribly insulting. If it’s a big taboo, like don’t do any blind jokes at the blind merchants convention, trust me, they will tell you. But don’t put the bug in their ear that you need any guidance on what NOT to say.
Another thing not to mention ahead of time is the jokes you wrote for them. Trust me, the client WILL find something wrong with many of the jokes. They will second, third and fourth guess you on it, and then all your hard work as well as some great material you’ve spent time writing, is down the drain. I think in the 16 years of doing comedy, I’ve probably only hit a topic 2 or 3 times that I maybe shouldn’t have mentioned. And I have so much faith in the first 5 minutes of my material, that I know I can get them back regardless of whatever I said that they didn’t like. One time I did a show for a group that had a reputation for heavy partying. I made a quick reference to it in the beginning of the show, and I shouldn’t have. Unknown to me, they were trying to change their image. Note to self, stay away from partying jokes unless you really, really, really know the crowd.
Jan
People You Can Goof With At the Meeting
I’m continuing my series of using appropriate humor. As I’ve mentioned, I do a lot of customized humor for groups. . .it’s a fun, fast way to connect right off the bat AND it makes my program more interesting to ME. I’ve heard my jokes, so it’s fun to come up with new ones.
So what else can you joke with. . .or should I say WHO can you joke with. Yes, you can have fun with people in the group, as long as it’s not mean spirited! I like to find out who I can joke with – someone the whole group knows, and what do we know about that person that most of the group knows (avid golfer, likes to crochet, etc. . ). Sometimes I have groups say things like “oh, yeah, make fun of her HUGE hair, or he’s getting divorced, it’s a riot!” Well, I’m sure it’s not a riot to him. My rule of thumb is that I don’t joke about anything that you wouldn’t say to that person’s face. I’m guessing the committee members don’t joke about her huge hair to her face or laugh about his divorce. . . so I won’t either.
With that said, the best people to joke with are the ones who are the most visible in the organization. Because generally:
They are used to it.
They kind of expect it.
They don’t mind being in the limelight.
Just make sure you find out something about that person that most of the group knows, so it’s not just a small, inside joke. And really dig deep. Saying Bob is a bad golfer doesn’t really give you much to go on. Saying Bob’s handicap is 89 and he’s broken 4 clubs by throwing them down the fairway, gives me something to work with. Also ask about known hobbies, family, events during their tenure, looks (in general, bald guys and/or tall guys are used to ribbing about it and it’ll USUALLY be fine.)
Other people/groups to goof with at conventions are the sponsors. Again, as long as you’re not mean and don’t bash their product, they usually like getting the extra attention. Face it, sometimes all they get for their money is a lousy banner and some non-professional emcee stumbling through a quick thank you or acknowledgement. I did a show for the Dry Bean Institute, and Bush Beans was a prominent sponsor. I had some fun joking about that talking dog Duke. Later that evening as I was crossing the parking lot, a huge limo pulls up and the window rolls down. . inside was a Bush Beans VP. I’m thinking I’m in trouble now. I said I hoped you liked the show, thanks for letting me goof around with you, etc. . .. He said “You were great. THANK YOU for mentioning us. That dog has made us a lot of money.” I was not mean about the dog and I didn’t say it was stupid. I think the joke was something about how that dog is in every commercial. And where are the other executives tonight. . oh, yeah, they’re outside, beating a theme to death. It was a hit with that executive anyway.
So go ahead and poke tasteful fun at people and sponsors. You can get some great lines.
3 Questions to ask about the event to write specific humor
Ok, on with the comedy writing blog. . .The next important question I like to ask clients about their group so that I can write specific material for them is:
What are the attendees’ biggest headaches and challenges? This will surprise you. What you may think is the worst part of their job, might not really be the worst part. If it’s a company, they may say something like the copier NEVER works. A lot of times they’ll say, well, I’m trying to think of what’s funny. I say leave that to me. Just tell me what your headaches are and I’ll work with that. And don’t let them stop with “budget problems” because everyone has those.
And a sister to question to that is, What is going on in the industry that I should know about? This will again give you some insight into headaches in the industry. And again, you may be surprised on what side of the issue they are on. When I did a show for the National Association of Blind Merchants they said that one of the biggest pushes in the industry was that a government group (I think it was a government group) was trying to change the size of each denomination of paper currency so that blind people could tell a five dollar bill from a 10, 20, etc. Surprisingly enough, the Blind Merchants were AGAINST this. They said we don’t need to spend time and energy with this project. Their problem isn’t that they can’t tell a 5 from a 10, they already know how to do that. Their problem is that they want more money, not telling bills apart. Now, if I hadn’t probed further, I might have written jokes that were pro-changing the size of currency, which would have gotten everything off to a bad start!
So investigate a little further and find out the real challenges both in their jobs and in their industry. Coming up in the next blog, a few more questions you can ask your client.
Aside from industry and day-to-day headaches, also ask about the theme of the event. Almost every conference has a theme, so you certainly want to find out what that is – whether it’s “go get ‘em” or “we can do it” or whatever. BUT more importantly, you want to ask HOW did they come up with that theme? The committee may have some funny logic as to why that them, and you’re off to the races with some great material. Armed with this information, you can also come up with some funny themes that the committee thought of but rejected or some variations on the theme they have. For example, if the theme is “Good to Great” (based on the popular book) you can have some fun that it’s better than last year’s “Mediocre to Good” theme OR that the competition has the theme “Mediocre to Good.”
Jan
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